 
December
2005
December
29 , 2005
Once
the rains come back, I don't get much done with my horses, because I don't
have a covered place, other than the barn, to work with them. So that
leads to long, dry (so to speak) spells on my diary during the winter.
However,
it's time for an update.
I
didn't get my weanling. I lost my Job From Hell at the end of October
and found that the holiday hiring slowdown had already started. That turned
out not to be a huge problem. I've had enough freelance work to keep me
busy. The only downside is that much of it has been the type that pays
later rather than sooner, so it hasn't really replenished our coffers.
We had the money to get the weanling, but I was afraid that she would
do something silly -- What? A weanling do something silly? -- and need
veterinary care. I wasn't sure we could afford that. So I made a very
difficult, but responsible, choice.
I
haven't been happy with the new horse list either. I I loved the concept.
I know what I wanted it to be and what I needed to get from it. But what
the members want it to be and have made it just bears no resemblance to
my vision. Since
they seem to be very much in tune with each other, I expect it's me that's
off -- that what I want just isn't possible right now, at least in an
open group on the Internet. That makes me sad, because I have so many
HUGE gaps in my knowledge, but hanging out with these people isn't helping
me. Initially I just disagreed with them. Now I actively dislike many
of them. Seeing messages come through from the list makes my stomach hurt.
I just don't know
what I'm going to do. I don't want to unsubscribe, but I'm not getting
anything positive out of it. If I had time to work with my horses, and
I had questions, I wouldn't go there to ask because at least half the
responses would be condescending. It's just... wrong. Very disappointing.
I haven't ridden
my horses in a while. I went riding with Brandy a time or two on Smokey,
but I haven't saddled mine up. Part of that is simple logistics. I don't
have a covered arena to ride in, so I'll ride only when it's dry but not
icy. The horses live, primarily in a large "dry lot" during
the winter to save my pastures. It isn't very dry though, and I can't
say that the prospect of grooming away that mud is much of a motivator.
I've felt the urge
to ride lately though. I'm not comfortable riding at my present weight,
but I've been going to the gym a little. While I'm not appreciably lighter,
it makes me feel stronger and more controlled. So maybe I'll get off my
butt and tack Guin up soon. It's funny though... I bet Blue would be the
safer choice.
As the year draws
to a close, I realize that I haven't made the progress I would like, on
my weight or on training my horses. So last week I did some goal setting
for the next year. I set some challenging but, I think, achievable, goals.
I want to take both horses through all of Alex's in-hand progression using
R+ methods, plus I want to freeshape a behavior each month. When I reach
a certain weight, I want to take riding lessons again. Next year will
be all about baby steps. Baby steps and perseverance.
Today I went out
and did a short session with Blue. I'm shaping him to back up, and today
I started adding a hand signal. My goal is to teach him to back continuously
on a hand signal, and later combine that with signals for stop, forward,
left, right, laterals, and so forth. But that's far away. Baby steps,
right?
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