Establishing "Dominance"

I recently read somewhere that allowing your dog to sleep in bed with you was showing submission to him.

That's a distortion. It's a very large oversimplification, that's often used to explain why you shouldn't let your dog sleep in bed with you.

Whether you should or not depends on how your training is going in general, and with how your dog behaves on or in the bed.

You need some rules for the dog if he's to sleep in bed with you. They are:

1. Dog moves over when asked to (asking nicely).
2. Dog gets off the bed when asked to, and settles comfortably somewhere else, such as, on a dog-bed, on a mat, in his crate.
3. Dog doesn't object when you kick him by mistake in your sleep or roll over on him by mistake, or, if you fell asleep reading, when you drop your book on him by mistake.

You can train the first two quite easily, using a clicker. Make it a fun game for the dog. I use, "Off!" for my dog(s) to get off the bed, if I don't care where they go. Or, I can say, "Go to your own bed," or, "Go to your own crate." Often, if you specify an alternative location (dogbed, mat, crate), the dog is happy to oblige, especially if there's a nice chewy-toy there that he doesn't get when he's on or in your bed.

Dogs like warm comfort and snuggling just as much as humans do, and if the dog can follow your rules, I see no harm in his sleeping on or in the bed with you.

Are there other ways in which I may be telling my dog that he is dominant without realizing it?

Sure, by not training the dog, and by not meeting all the dog's real needs. When a dog-owner doesn't meet all the dog's real needs, the dog must needs try to do it himself. Dogs often aren't very good at doing this and at the same time, following human household rules.

If you pay attention to meeting all the dog's real needs, in a timely way, if you teach your dog to doze or occupy himself on his own mat, in his crate or pen (or, if you prefer, on your bed), while you're busy doing other things, you are likely to have a well-behaved dog, given time to train him. Make it attractive and fun for your dog to comply with your wishes. If your dog comes along and interrupts you while you're "working" (reading this list?) - ask yourself, "Does my dog have a need that I havne't met? If so, is it a need that I need to meet right now, or can the dog wait a bit?"

Then proceed accordingly. I cue my dogs: "I'll call you when it's time," if they have a need that isn't met, but I know they can wait for a bit. So, my dogs settle down again, to wait. But if one needs to go out, I'll certainly get up and let - or take - the dog out. If their walk is due, I might ask them to wait a bit. If the water bowl is empty, I fill it.

And how can I reassert dominance after letting him sleep with me for weeks?

You don't need to worry about "dominance." Concern yourself with teaching the dog how to live harmoniously with you, and any other humans and animals. For more information, read Jean Donaldson's book _The Culture Clash_. That should help you lots!

Dogs need to feel safe and secure, and to feel able to trust their Caretakers and Guides - that's us. When we adopt dogs, we become their Caretakers and Guides. In effect, we hold our dogs captive, so we are responsible for meeting the needs they can't themselves meet without our help. Here's a list of needs that every dog has (may be added to by anybody).

We need to meet these needs on a reasonable schedule for the dog, so that none goes unmet long enough to cause a problem. Notice that I put social feedback the very first - without social feedback, the animal dies inside. Social feedback is two-way communication between dog and owner.

1. Social feedback (includes being a pack member): a place to be;
2. Water, food, shelter, protection from the elements;
3. Grooming and medical care;
4. At least adequate mental stimulation and rest time;
5. At least adequate physical exercise and rest time.

Carol Whitney
cwhitney@islandnet.com
copyright 2000 Carol Whitney

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